Just Like Stage Fright

I remember when I was in fourth grade and I was chosen to be the angel in the Christmas play. My line was simple, I still remember it clearly. “Rejoice, for unto us a child is born.” But on the day of the show, I didn’t expect to see a crowd of parents and families to be watching, that I froze the moment I walked on stage. I don’t remember how I got through that afternoon. I may have even ran to backstage and then out on centre stage again. All I know is that that was the last time I ever tried theatre. 

I get stage fright. I do. Even at things I know I’m exceptionally good at. There was a Math contest at sixth grade when I froze at an easy question. I knew the answer but as soon as I looked at the audience my mind stalled. I get stage fright. Just like today. I’m meeting my blog coach outside of the confines of the workshop for the very first time, on a one-on-one basis, to explore the possibilities of the world wide web of blogging. It’s not exactly my first time at blogging. There was Friendster, then Multiply and my current one, in Blogger. But those were different, more personal, more like a virtual notebook. No one necessarily read that, no one unless I gave out the link. No one that I know personally, at least. 

But now it’s different, because now I want an audience. I need to be heard. Because I feel like I have something to say. See but what if, just like theatre, no one shows up on opening  night? That’s what scares me. What if no one wants to listen? What if my story isn’t really worth telling?

My Top 5 NYC Movies

I can’t believe that January is almost over. I’m still suffering from a New York City hangover after spending the last week of 2013 in The Big Apple. Does anyone even use that nickname for the city these days?

Walking in the streets of Manhattan, I keep running into ghosts of New York past. Memories from trips of long ago. When was my first NY visit, was it 1977 or 1978 or 1979? Can you believe that I actually watched the very first original cast of Little Orphan Annie in Broadway? I went up the Empire State as a child. I also rode the bullet elevators of the World Trade Center back when it was still the tallest building(s) in the world; and yes back when the towers were still standing. 

The romantic in me had memories from my lost childhood interweaving with memories from movie scenes with recognizable NY landmarks come flooding back into my consciousness. Even my carryon bag still has items from past visits, like a pin from The Metropolitan Museum, a ticket from the Museum of Natural History, a sticker that says I heart NY. Why do I even keep these things? Maybe it’s because--I heart NY. All these years that I visit, I take home a little part of NYC and leave behind a little memory in some forgotten corner. Memories that haunted me in this latest visit.

So this made me think about my most favorite NY movies. There are countless movies written and produced about New York because the city that never sleeps attracts the most romantic of dreamers and writers. With much difficulty, I trimmed down my favorites into these 5 movies:

5th. The Thomas Crown Affair (1999)

The Pierce Brosnan and Renee Russo remake. I haven’t watched the original 1968 version nor do I intend to. I have been a Brosnan fan ever since the days of Remington Steele. He plays the perfect rich, spoiled gentleman that you wouldn’t think he was capable of any crime. Yet he was as arrogant as he was smart that you want to hate him so much but end up so drawn to him just as much as Russo’s character was.

My favorite NY scene from the movie is the moment he poses at the entrance of The Met and twirls so that he is in full view of all the surveillance cameras before he performs the perfectly staged diversionary tactic I have seen on the silver screen. If you love art as much as I do, you would enjoy all the artwork references in this movie. For each visit, I make time to visit a museum or an art gallery. However, even outdoors, the streets of NY are dotted with art.  

4th. An Affair To Remember (1957)

A Classic with Cary Grant and Deborah Kerr. I watched both the original and the remake versions of this movie. I prefer the original movie. Maybe because the references made to it in the movie Sleepless in Seattle make you want to love it even more as the characters of Meg Ryan and Rosie O’Donnell reenact scenes in tears. Why do women (myself included) cry so easily from watching Hallmark TV ads to movie scenes watched one hundred times over? 

My favorite NY scene from this movie comes from the last scene when Nickie clues into what really happened that fateful day when he and Terrie were supposed to meet at the top of the Empire State Building. Terry says, “Oh, it's nobody's fault but my own! I was looking up... it was the nearest thing to heaven! You were there...” She trails off breathlessly.

I’m afraid to admit that this rings true for me. For wherever my love walks and breaths, I find that that is where I am at home, at peace.

3rd. One Fine Day (1996)

This George Clooney and Michelle Pfeiffer movie takes place in one hectic day all over NYC that you can’t help wanting to see all those places. George Clooney’s Jack Taylor, in all his cuteness, doesn’t make a good impression on the feminist Michelle Pfeiffer’s Melanie Parker. Both single parents forced to tow their kids to work when the kids miss to join their kindergarten class on a field trip for the day. 

My favorite NY scene from the movie is when Jack lifts Melanie in an act of chivalry as they come across a huge puddle at the Bethesda Terrace as they ran across Central Park to catch the kids’ soccer game. I first fell in love with The Angel of the Waters at the Bethesda Terrace when I saw her in this movie. It was designed by Emma Stebbins as the first commissioned work in NY. The angel was unveiled way back in 1873. 

I finally viewed her for the very first time on January 1, 2014. I did a many firsts on the first day of this year. The angel could very well be my lucky charm. 

2nd. Definitely, Maybe (2008)

For the most part, this movie stars Ryan Reynolds and Abigail Breslin. Reynolds is a newly-single dad who is served divorce papers at the beginning of the movie. The premise in itself is romantic as Will Hayes (dad) recounts his love stories to his 10-year-old daughter, Maya, in the hopes of making her understand how love becomes complicated as people get older.

My favorite NY scene is in Central Park (again) just outside The Zoo.

[Maya and Sarah are walking away, Maya turns around]

Maya Hayes: Dad!

[Will turns around, Maya runs to him, Will kneels]

Maya Hayes: Thanks for telling me the story.

Will Hayes: You're welcome. I didn't tell you the happy ending.

Maya Hayes: [getting teary] What is it?

Will Hayes: You.

I love this movie because I secretly wish I am April to my Will Hayes. I secretly wish for the same happy ending to my almost 10 year old (and counting) love story. I am the umm-friend, the constant, the one always passed up for the prettier, classier chick. Sigh.

1st. Serendipity (2001)

This movie tops my list. I know the movie plot is a stretch as far as storytelling goes. But the visuals and the soundtrack of this movie makes the opening scenes my cookie-cutter NYC perfect day. John Cusack and Kate Beckinsale meet serendipitously at Bloomingdale’s before Christmas. Two separate lives intersect and after that day, they are flung apart to live their lives, each wondering if they have missed something. 

In 2007, my girl-friends and I went to Serendipity and tried the Frozen Hot Chocolate that Jon and Sara had on that “first date.” Following that scene, Jon and Sara decided to go ice skating at Wollman Rink in Central Park as it started snowing in the background.

My favorite NY scene? At the said rink when Jon and Sara were playing Q&A, Sara asks Jon, “Um, favorite New York moment?” Jon answers, “This one’s climbing the charts.”

The movie ends at the same spot. As it starts snowing in Spring, Jon and Sara meet formally for the first time since their fated day.  

On New Year’s Eve of 2013, I experienced a similar scene from out of a movie. Skating rink, snow softly falling, skates, a cute guy and a hand to hold. It was a perfect New York moment of my own.

What's your top 5 NYC movie list?


Photo credits: Harry Corro, January 2014

Non-negotiables

I drafted a list of non-negotiables a few years back to help me find Mr Right. I found a printed copy folded neatly in between the pages of a book as I was looking for something else that I have misplaced. Here's the list for posterity's sake. Not that I think it would help anyone, since I'm still unmarried. That's not to say I haven't found the person who checks all the items in the list; in fact, Someone does check on almost all except for one. I won't take away from the original list, just add a few words to explain my point back then. 

The List

1. Must have love, lots of it; both of us in large amounts. Love for self. Love for the other. Love for Life!

2. Must not have previous marriage or children or live-in partner. The biggest secret is that I'm a very jealous person. 

3. Must fear God, must have some sort of faith, such as going to church and praying, and loving God's creations. 

4. Must be an artist (in one way or another). 

5. Must be in Canada. 

6. Must be smart and have an education to prove it.

7. Must think I'm the best creation on Earth. 

8. Must love to travel and know how to get enraptured while travelling. 

9. Must listen when I need to talk. 

10. Must accept that I'm a writer. 

11. Must know when to leave me alone (or when not to leave me alone). 

12. Must love to make love. 

Number 5 is the only negotiable item at the moment. Primarily because even I keep moving around. Though home is Canada, family obligations have lead me back to my childhood city. But my heart knows only one thing -- that home is where he is, wherever that may be.