Two days ago, I unleashed the Hulk in me at work. Who can forget that famous line, "Don't make me angry. You wouldn't like me when I'm angry," from childhood? When I accepted my new post nearly four months ago, I asked that I not take on the managerial responsibilities so I can concentrate on mastering the tasks of cash management and other financial matters. I thought doing that would isolate me from supervising other staff but I was merely being myopic about the matter because everything and almost everyone's jobs related back to me.
One particular thing has become my pet peeve and I'm not just being whimsical about it. Day in and day out our one cash register was always out of balance. 98% percent of the time. Retail sales figures about 7% of total monthly sales. However, cash and other cash-related payments from sales by our sales reps are also rung through that one till. Now correct me if I'm wrong, but we're no Wal-Mart in terms of daily volume, so is it too much to ask to balance the cash out at the end of the day? It's not a matter of not having enough cash, it's a matter of recording all sales transactions. So for the nth time last Wednesday, I was receiving an incomplete report. I'm not making any excuses, though I may have been exhausted, at 5 minutes to going home, I blew my top. There were 2 staff left at the retail showroom. After rejecting the report, I screamed an expletive to no one in particular. Surprised with myself and slightly worried if I was turning bipolar. I quickly packed and left with a gruff goodbye, brushing off the one staff's apologies.
I felt sick losing control. I'm usually Steady Eddy. Back in the day, I would have went straight away to find a priest. Instead, I went straight home and did my own examination of conscience.
I was turning into ugh a manager.
The next morning, the senior retail staff, the other person present when I reprimanded the younger staff, came to see me. She wanted to have a word about the incident. I was ready to stand my ground in case she defended the other. Since every front staff was also guilty of the deed on a regular basis. I was relieved to find out that she agreed with me and that her not getting involved in the matter meant that I was on the right track. Yet I still apologized for losing my patience.
Later in the day, I called in the younger staff into my office. I wanted to give her tips on how to avoid her mistakes or how to solve her own problems. I had to explain that my backtracking their every move was not only a waste of my time and energy, but more that it was part of their job to be detailed and focused.
She left after promising never to commit the same mistakes again. I felt something foreign. I was beginning to sound like ugh a parent. Memories from childhood was sneaking from my subconscious. My mother telling me after a long scolding, "you understand why we're doing this right? It's because we love you."
So at 5 minutes to closing, I had such high hopes until I heard those dreaded words. My heart sank. She was out of balance. Once again. I let out a deep sigh. Told her and her supervisor that every mistake they make comes off of total retail sales. I was resorting to punishment. Suddenly I had aged in less than 24 hours. From an ugly green monster, to a nurturing parent. Somewhere in between, I suppose, is a good manager and leader.
